yay, happy fucking 4th of July, the day of Independence, woopty shit. I dont care for this holiday, it. . .it has been strange to me. When I was young, it was the best, I always loved it, I spent it with my cousins, especially my cousin who I was like best friends with. And then like 5 years ago, my parents and my uncle and aunt got into a fight (summer of 6th grade). Since then, Ive seen my cousins twice, both were by mistake and only once was with that cousin whom I favored. ::sigh:: It also some how managed to bring my school bully to me twice (summer of 7th and 8th grade), which wasnt enjoyable. But it has broughten me good times. Last year I met up with a friend who I hadnt seen in a year (same one who said he would have sex with me but was scared by my virginity). I also had one of the most memorable evenings with my ex. . .yes, the one I talk about constantly and miss dearly (summer of 9th grade). But I should move on. . .I need to cry, I really need him. . .maybe for this year, Ill get a miracle and Ill get to see him, but I doubt it...and even if I do, chances are, unlike me, hes moved on and its no longer a shared love thing but more of a obsession over former. . .God, I hate life